Laney

• What is this, some sort of dork outreach program?

• I feel just like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. You know, except for the whole hooker thing.

• Who the HELL would nominate me?

• Am I a bet? Am I a FUCKING BET?

Zach

• This is all fascinating, Taylor, but could you skip to the part where you decided to screw me over.

• Sometimes when you open up to people, you let the bad in with the good.

• All you have left is a C minus GPA with a Wonderbra.

• Give her the right look, the right boyfriend, and bam. In six weeks she’s being named prom queen.

• So, Laney, I was wondering if you wanted to… [Laney walks away]… embarrass me horribly in front of all these people.

Brock

• It’s not about disrespect, it’s just gas.

• You didn’t really think I’d leave for All-Star “Road Rules” and still be dating you? Oh, you did? That’s so sweet.

Other

• Mackenzie: So who’s the lucky rebound skank?

• Taylor: You didn’t think you became popular for real, did you? Oh, you did? That’s so sweet.

• Dean: One second, you’re Zach Siler, class president, stand-out athlete, all-around bad-ass mamba-jahamba; the next thing you know, you’re Zach Siler, bitch-boy.

• Girl: My soul is an island, my car is a Ford.

Dialogue

:Zach: She kinda blew me off.
:Mackenzie: I like her already.
:Dean: I mean, the girl’s an institution in this place. Every girl wants to be her, and every guy wants to nail her.
:Preston: Basically she’s you, with tits.
:Dean: Is that a no?
:Laney: That’s a hell no.
:Zach: What was that?
:Laney: I was busy.
:Zach: Yeah, busy wiggin’.
:Laney: I did not wig.
:Zach: Oh, there was major wiggage.
:Taylor: [spilling drink on Laney] Oh, Oopsie. You know, you really should be more careful with silk.
:Laney: Thank you.
:Taylor: Excuse me?
:Laney: Thank you. For a minute there, I forgot why I avoided places like this and people like you.
:Taylor: Avoided us? Honey, look around you. To everyone here who matters, you’re vapor, you’re spam, a waste of perfectly good yearbook space, and nothing’s ever gonna change that.
[Laney's eyes tear up]
:Taylor: Oh, you aren’t going to cry are you?
:Laney: Simon! Simon, I have got your breakfast! Are you up?
:Simon: Give me a couple of minutes.
:Laney: Simon Boggs, there are children in Mexico who have already been up for three hours making clothes for corporate America.
:Mackenzie: When was the last time you tweezed?
:Laney: What?
:Mackenzie: I mean your eyebrows.
:Laney: Never, why?
:Mackenzie: Ever watch Sesame Street?
:Laney: Yeah.
:Mackenzie: You know Bert?
:Laney: Screw the dolphins.
:Jesse: A guy tried that last year, banned from Sea World for life.
:Taylor: Careful of what? OK, I could win this thing in florescent lighting, on the first day of my period, cloaked in tacky rags. Okay? My mother was prom queen in ’71, my cousin – prom queen in ’82, and my sister would have been prom queen in ’94 if it wasn’t for that scam on the Conway Bed tour bus, okay? I am a goddamn legacy, all right? And besides, not to be a bitch, but who’s gonna beat Taylor Vaughan?
:Katie: God, I hope that’s not your acceptance speech.
:Jesse: I’m Jesse Jackson. I’m not a good dancer.
:Mackenzie: I’m Mac. I go to school with 500 chicks.
:Taylor: Jump up my ass Zach.
:Zach: Been there, done that.
:Zach: So, can I have the last dance?
:Laney: No, you can have the first.
:Zach: Has anyone see Taylor?
:Chandler: What?
:Zach: You know, Taylor, my girlfriend.
:Dean: Kinda tall, yells at everyone?
:Laney: Sir, have you reached a decision?
:Man: Yes I have. Supersize my balls.
:Zach: Brock Hudson? What kind of a name is that?
:Taylor: What kind of a name is “Zach?” OK, Brock is from “The Real World.”
:Zach: What, Reseda?
:Taylor : No, like the TV show. “Real World LA”, second season, hello!
:Zach: The dyslexic volleyball guy? They kicked him out of the house.
:Dean: His dad owns Harrison Ford.
:Laney: The actor?
:Dean: No, the car dealership.
:Mackenzie: Nothing personal, Laney, but this particular… coif, doesn’t really go with your face shape.
:Laney: What do you have in mind?
:Mackenzie: Well, I have an idea.
:Laney: What kind of idea?
:Mackenzie: …You’d really have to trust me.
:Melissa: He spoke to me!
:Girl #2: He called you Connie!
:Melissa: So?
:Girl #2: Your name is Melissa!

Cast

• Freddie Prinze Jr. — Zach Siler

• Rachael Leigh Cook — Laney Boggs

• Matthew Lillard — Brock Hudson

• Paul Walker — Dean Sampson

• Jodi Lyn O’Keefe — Taylor Vaughan

• Kevin Pollak — Wayne Boggs

• Anna Paquin — Mackenzie Siler

• Kieran Culkin — Simon Boggs

• Elden Henson — Jesse Jackson

• Usher Raymond — Campus DJ

• Kimberly ‘Lil’ Kim’ Jones — Alex

• Gabrielle Union — Katie

• Dulé Hill — Preston

• Tamara Mello — Chandler

Source: Wikiquote